Tips
- A study indicated that close to 50 % of college students statement having exposure to an ex boyfriend.
- Some body had significantly more contact whenever they got ideas on ex boyfriend, had friendly breakups, otherwise were not along the break up.
- When get in touch with occurred as old boyfriend was part of a larger buddy classification, anyone claimed way more satisfaction with their most recent relationships.
- People that was indeed disappointed in the another dating were apt to be to keep in contact with exes because the a prospective duplicate.
It’s fairly well-known for all those to keep exposure to previous intimate partners. step 1,2 Exactly what happens when you enter into a different sort of matchmaking? Might you take care of contact with an ex boyfriend otherwise reduce her or him aside? Can it be bad for your brand-new dating in case the ex boyfriend continues to be in your lifetime? Speaking of concerns a lot of us can relate genuinely to, but they have not been tested far because of the relationships boffins-up until now.
In 2 knowledge, Lindsay Rodriguez along with her acquaintances interviewed young people from inside the personal dating to determine how many times they communicate with exes, as to the reasons it take care of contact, and you may what one to says about their latest relationships. 3 The original study surveyed 260 undergraduates, who have been and their most recent lover for around an excellent month along with a past relationship you to survived at the least three days.
As to the reasons staying the notion of an effective reunion on the rear burner tends to be an issue
It learned that regarding 40 % of one’s pupils kept in touch which have an ex. On majority (more than ninety per cent), this correspondence first started within this months of your own separation and you can went on to happen at least one time all of the month or two. People did not communicate with its ex boyfriend too often, but a little subgroup-thirteen %-had experience of exes once or twice a week.
Who’s likely to keep in touch with an old boyfriend? The greater number of severe brand new status of your own newest relationship (elizabeth.g., hitched otherwise almost interested versus. dating), the fresh not as likely players would be to keeps exposure to an ex boyfriend. Although not, continued communications which have an ex boyfriend was unrelated to help you exactly how big brand new relationship with the brand new ex boyfriend got. (This might be probably since these people dating in uw jaren ’30 was in fact relatively young, so they really would not have the same level of investment you to definitely need future contact, instance co-child-rearing, that may occur whenever a whole lot more the amount of time relationships break up.) Alternatively, it was their ideas regarding their ex and you may towards breakup you to definitely predicted contact: Everyone was likely to talk to exes they however got thinking having. These were including more likely to keep in touch which have exes once they thought that new break up try more self-confident-described as skills and you will too little indicate and you will freaky conclusion. In the long run, those who reported that these people were maybe not across the separation was basically likely to be as opposed to others to keep contact with their ex.
What effects performs this features for people’s current matchmaking? As a whole, those who lived in reach which have an old boyfriend had a tendency to getting faster invested in the most recent partner than those whom don’t, however, contact with an ex wasn’t from the exactly how fulfilling it found its most recent relationships.
In the the next investigation, the new researchers further looked exactly how experience of exes refers to brand new top-notch the modern relationship by the investigating mans things about staying in contact. It interviewed 169 undergraduate students into the relationships, who told you it conveyed with an ex boyfriend at least once every month or two.
This time, the group discovered a connection between contact with exes additionally the top-notch the present day relationship: The greater frequent the fresh contact with an ex, brand new faster found professionals had been employing most recent matchmaking.
